My bear with the Wales flag on his chest is sitting next to my computer. Why do I tell you this? Because little things matter. Today, after I came home from water aerobics and exchanging the wrong crochet thread at the craft store, my energy was really depleted. I was extremely happy to be home. Then I realized that I had left two things at the gym. I asked Art to drive me back because I couldn’t even face driving at that moment. He was busy and besides wanted to make a call to the gym first. I almost burst into tears. I felt so sad and exhausted and didn’t even know why.
Later, after lying down for a few minutes, I remembered that I did know what could refuel me. I had not read my scriptures, not even one verse, and I had not put my burdens in the hands of the Lord. After doing so (and it took less than five minutes) I was revived. It was amazing.
Now I even know some of the reasons I was feeling sad. I have been putting a crocheted edging on a blanket for my friend who has been diagnosed with cancer. I missed a funeral at noon today because the thought didn’t rise to my consciousness until it was over (although it must have been weighing on me below the surface). At water aerobics I began to quiz my friend about her husband’s knee surgery. I noticed myself edging ever closer to making that decision but not without great reluctance. Art and I are both seeing our doctors tomorrow. As usual I am afraid of what they will tell us. The days pass too fast with seemingly not enough done. And I still have the same old weaknesses. What a load to carry on my own!
So my little bear with his cute little grin and black beady eyes reminds me that yes, life isn’t easy, but there are good times, like the day I found him in a store in Wrexham, and now I remember that humor is never far away.
